xo, The Expressive Introvert: Exclusive Behind-The-Scenes Interviews with Women Who Work, Live, & Love On Their Own Terms is an occasional interview feature here to help cultivate that bit of authentic self-expression within you we all want a littlle more of.
I met Bianca 2 years ago (doesn’t seem like that long ago) in Marie Forleo’s B-School program for online entrepreneurs.
Soon after, I discovered we also shared many of the same voice values in our businesses. (Values, like helpfulness & depth).
I not only respect Bianca’s work with introverts, but I appreciate that she seems to be very connected with her vision and purpose – something I not only highly value in my own life, but I look for in colleagues, collaborators, and interviewees for this series.
I believe wholeheartedly in bringing you women who embody exactly what this series promises: women working, living, & loving on their own terms. Bianca is doing just that.
Bianca Filoteo, Storyteller & Visibility Mentor
As a shy and introverted person herself, Bianca combines her experiences as an actor, screenwriter, video editor, producer, and filmmaker with her work mentoring clients in their online video visibility and video marketing.Bianca Filoteo is a professional storyteller and online visibility mentor for entrepreneurs.
She collaborates with entrepreneurs to produce videos for their businesses while also helping them gain confidence to share their stories on camera.
When did you know for sure, without a doubt, you were an introvert?
I learned about introvertion/extroversion when I was in high school. I remember taking the Myers-Briggs test online and my result was INFP [Tamisha’s note – I’m an INTJ]. Since then, I started to read more about the topic.
Usually, every introvert (and extrovert) has qualities of both introversion and extroversion. What is one of your favorite extroverted qualities about yourself?
I can be really enthusiastic and animated – especially with my performing arts background. I was really scared and intimidated when I first joined an improv class, fearing that my introversion would just get in the way, but I ended up really enjoying improv! As an introvert, I prefer to plan ahead and be fully prepared, but improv has really helped me think on my feet (and enjoy that a bit more). My actor training over the years has also helped me become more open to express myself.
Can you share a situation or time where you would have done something differently, based on your current knowledge of introversion and yourself (in a job, your life in general, or in a relationship)?
There was a period in my life where I over-exhausted myself and pretty much played the role of an extrovert, where I got myself into a situation where I piled too much onto my plate. I got involved with way too many projects, and I used up all of my energy participating in a lot of groups. I didn’t take any time for myself to relax, breathe and recharge so those couple of weeks completely drained me. I remember laying on the couch one day after I completed those projects and I asked myself “what just happened?” I was in such a state of “Go, go go!” that it took a while to remember what happened. So I learned a big lesson from that, and self-care has become a big priority in my life now.
Do you have a favorite celebrity who is also an introvert? Why is he/she your favorite?
Meryl Streep and Oprah! They’re both successful women and powerful storytellers who remind me that we don’t need to be extroverts to get to where they are.
How has being introverted affected your relationships over time as you’ve come to know more about yourself? (Friendships, romantic relationships, etc. )
I think I’ve gotten more self-assured in social situations. I no longer worry about trying to impress people (ie. by accepting all their social invitations) and I no longer put pressure on myself to say YES to everyone’s requests.
When I do spend my time with people, I always aim to be there fully present and open, and over the years I’ve found that my compassion and empathy have strengthened.
What wisdom would you give to your younger self?
Always follow your heart and listen to your gut no matter what others tell you (in the form of advice or rules). You’ll know deep down what you need to do/say. Embrace using your intuition more often.
What is your favorite (or most-used) form of self-expression and what do you love about it?
Acting and writing. These are the two areas where I find the most creative freedom. I love them both as they’re great ways to tell other people’s stories. Writing as a meditative exercise has also been really helpful, especially during those times where I’ve felt overwhelmed or stuck.
What last bit of advice would you give to an introverted woman reading this right now who might be struggling in some area of her business or job, life, or relationship because of either her introversion or her need for validation in her individuality?
- Treat your introversion as a positive thing in your life and apply those strengths in your business, job and life.
- Challenge yourself and sign-up for a class that’s outside of your comfort zone – you’ll learn a lot about yourself, and meeting other people does help with strengthening your own individuality.
I’m pretty sure I couldn’t have said that better (that last bullet point), Bianca. Thank you SO much for being here & helping us move a little closer to our fullest expression.
Do you have any questions for Bianca about her work, her thoughts, or something she shared you’d like to talk more on?
If so, leave a comment below and let us know or share this interview with a friend or community. And, as always, thank you TONS for being here & being committed to a stronger you,